 |
|
|
||||||||||||||
 |
||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
 |
||||
1996 "Cause & Effect" ____________________________ January 1996 Through automatic writing, Tara's spirit guide Abenda answers question about the death of a grandchild, life lessons, a widow's lost love, and an autistic son. ____________________________ As this issue goes to press, Richard and I are welcoming in the winter solstice and the New Year by investigating our Celtic heritage in Scotland. These ancient sites are beautiful. Their mysteries will enrich our lives for a long time to come. In the last issue of Soaring Spirit I published a letter from Rachel in Maryland; a women in search of the details explaining her present relationship with Frank. Rachel, like so many others, wanted to find out why she and Frank continue to incarnate together again and again. The automatic writing session produced a wonderful note from Abenda: Love does not have a color, religion, or age. Love is energy of life; it helps you through the pain and sacrifices. Whether it be soulmate or karmic love... Here is the letter I received from Rachel regarding Abenda's response: "I would like to thank you for publishing my letter concerning Frank and myself in the last issue of Soaring Spirit. ...I was particularly interested in the comment by Abenda about love having no 'color, religion or age.' Although I hadn't indicated this anywhere in my letter, I am white, and Frank is black and was born in Harlem, facts which have, of course, formed his life in ways which are very different from mine. I am also several years older than he is, which has been of some concern to me but not to him. I regard Abenda's statement as being more than generalized philosophy." Abenda and I thank you and send you peace and light When Abenda wrote, Love does not have a color, religion, or age she was speaking to all of us on Planet School House Earth. It is my sincere belief that love does not die -- it cannot die, for it is not limited to the physical boundaries of time and space. Karmically, incompatibility, fighting and divorce are only temporary set backs. They are learning experiences necessary to achieve harmony and to overcome fear, which is the opposite of love. Abenda says you should be willing to feel that you deserve health, good relationships, security and happiness. This is an important key to unlocking the karmic wheel. But bad things will happen. Sometimes this darkness is the path that leads you to wisdom and insight. We each return anew, in search of innocence and laughter, and although we have the ability to learn through love and wisdom, we usually choose to learn through pain. This is what karma is all about; learning to live and love in the face of adversity. My guide Abenda chose some of these letters from one of my older files. She felt the largest number of people would relate to the messages given in this column. Your letters are not forgotten.
Q. On March 8th, 1994, my husband's grandson Andre was hit by an automobile and died without ever regaining consciousness. After Andre died, his mother (my husband's daughter from a previous marriage) claimed that she visited a psychic who told her that I was responsible for Andre's death. I cannot figure out how this could be possible as I was at work when the accident took place. My husband and I had raised Andre because his mother was only nineteen when he was born, and his father never took any parental responsibility. I loved Andre, and would never do anything to hurt him. In fact, the Christmas before the accident, Andre's mother told him that I was not his real Grandmother, but only his step-grandmother. When Andre returned home I explained that indeed it was true, but that I would always be his friend. Why did he choose to leave us? For years this incident has bothered me. Please help me to put it to rest. P.M. A. A Chinese man named Wan Ho Ming came in to say this: "I know you have gone over and over how you could've helped your grandson, but it is not your fault and the anger within your stepdaughter is her own. She took no responsibility for his upbringing and blamed you out of guilt -- attack and denial. This guilt is part of her karmic lineage. Andre was a child who knew that he did not have an easy life. Seemingly rejected by his own parents, he had rejected many others in a previous life. He was a very stern Chinese man, who owned a silk factory and he had many beautiful concubines. You and your step-daughter were his wards. You tried not to have much contact with each other then, as you were both his favorites. And he even had you sharing him in this life as a child. Dutifully you cared for him. But now it is time to understand; you are not guilty. Fate steps most cruelly on the earth, and you handled your karma in a good and positive way. You must still see Andre's mother from time to time. But you are to let go with love, knowing the discomfort of this karma will someday change. I am here as you need me. I am a devoted friend from our Chinese life. Note From Abenda: You must let go of sorrow and the embodiment of a life lost, you cannot do anything to change your grandson's death, nor could you have. He died to release the bonds that held this triangle of extreme emotion. You are to give your love to your own son now. Wish Andre love and light on all his newest journeys as he wishes you all his love and friendship.
Q. My marriage wasn't what I thought it would be. My husband was an alcoholic and a skirt chaser. We divorced after nine years and two children. While on my own, my daughter was molested by my baby-sitter's 19 year old son. I have had cancer twice and I have been in two car accidents in the last three years leaving me with two ruptured discs. I have a bone fragment chipped off in my lower back and it could cause paralysis. I have been interested in meditation and your husband's work for years but my question to you is, "What do I need to learn?" Jean White A. A beautiful French woman wrote this: You must not feel sad and alone. When you were Jean Paul in 1891 in Paris, you were run down by a carriage filled with supplies, and you were only two years old! You spent the rest of that life paralyzed. I was your mother, a countess, Anna Marie Arnelia. I tried to make you comfortable and happy. We were with each other constantly and we were the best of friends. If it wasn't for the accident, I wouldn't have known you as well. You would've led a very different life. When I needed you, you were there for me, and I tried to be there for you. It is time to release the effects of that life, the overcaring -vs- the neediness. It is not too late. You seek friendship and caring in difficult ways. You are very hard on yourself. Be gentle and loving toward your back, be protective in the cold and out of doors. Attract people who are kind, go to events, you will surely meet friends. Your opinion counts, be open and honest about who you are. You'll be fine if you can stay brave and loving. Note from Abenda: You were a precious child, do not linger in self pity as this is the root of the woes in this life. You must act positively and in gently caring ways. Do not close yourself off from others, your love life will come to fruition in the year. You are looking for your former mother at the expense of your health, this cannot be, as she is here on this plane of existence and not on the earth at this time. Rethink and reprogram your need for each other so that you find yourself in good solid experiences in this life. No More Neediness.
Q. My husband died last Tuesday. He was actually my ex-husband but we had finally begun to work out the rough spots. These last four months were the happiest of all in the six years we were together. We were looking forward to the spring, which was when we had planned to remarry. Then, last Monday he left for work as a train engineer. It was the last time I ever saw him alive. Several weeks prior to his death I had a dream in which I saw him dying -- actually dead in his casket. I awoke in tears, but tried to put it out of my mind thinking that it was just some nightmare. After his death I learned that his mother had a similar dream, but she thought it was herself dying. Now she knows it wasn't. He was making plans for our future and was so happy! I need to understand why he died when we were the happiest and the future held such promise for us. Barbara Bise A. A dark haired woman came in to respond: You should try to experience the simple pleasures again like you did with your husband. He was a stubborn sort, but a good man. You will soon reclaim that part of your youth when you felt free and life was fun and adventurous. You and Gene had a life in Lemuria, where he was involved in the making of metal tools and you raised three children. You had a good life, but the Island/Continent gave way to horrible floods and you both died. This gave you terrible guilt. In dying you deserted your children. There was no one to watch over and appreciate your loved ones. So this time you stayed behind and began to live again. That is your karma and it will be a gift to Gene to live well and carry on his light. Note From Abenda: You have felt alone and unloved since the passing of your dear Gene. You have known love and you will know it again. You were able to reverse some of the negative aspects within your relationship and because of this, the karma in future incarnations will be very good. Do not despair that Gene died when the two of you were happy. What matters is where he was in his life's journey. He had love, and is and was an honorable person. This was a soul goal for him. He is thankful and loves you greatly for the life you shared. You are now on another path of destiny. Concentrate on your own spirit. How are you handling your life? It is time to start looking at the bright and beautiful moments. You can not hold back and truly live. You must remember this when taking miniature steps to regain your self esteem. You will enjoy life again.
Q. I have a nineteen year old son who is for lack of a better word, "autistic." As a small child he was a pleasure to care for, but as he got older, puberty, he started getting violent, smashing things and hurting us and himself. I've been getting lots of pressure from my husband, who is my son's stepfather to put him in a foster home and "get a life." We've had some problems recently and Dave, my son, was kicked out of school for hitting his teacher. You see, Dave was recently tested for food allergies and of the 50 foods tested, he was allergic to all but 2 of them. The food he eats makes the lining of his brain swell and causes him to become violent. What can I do to make my son's life better? Robin Alberts A. A woman named Martha came to answer: Stay with the weightlessness, for you have an over burdened head and heart. You feel you are suspended in space, not able to feel anything around you. Your son, was a rambling cowboy when he came to work on your ranch in Virginia in the early 1900's. He was kind and very helpful. You had a very nice life and you worked very hard but there were only small joys. You started having an affair with this cowboy. There were only two or three trysts before you were "found out". Your past life husband bashed the cowboy's head in with a shovel, killing him, as all the ranch hands watched. You became ill a few years later and died; not being well cared for, as your husband didn't like others near you. You have chosen to care for your cowboy in this life. He is not quite right mentally, but you feel terribly guilty if you do not care for him. His feelings and thought processes are suspended in another place, his guilt is and was overwhelming. It is a time to forgive him and yourself. You do have a right to love, even if it means distancing yourself from your son. You will still be there for him, it is within you to be caring and loving. Know that the choices you make will grant you peace. Note from Abenda: You are deserving of love and peace. Choices are not always easy, but you will engage in many activities that will benefit many people. You will eventually feel you have done something good for all involved. It is not the stranger who looks in upon you, it is you who looks upon the stranger.
Q. Several years ago, I was to land a major recording contract. I have had many readings with psychics, healers and astrologers and they all tell me that music is my life's work. But it has never come through. I feel trapped by the people around me. I cannot seem to distance my self from a bad relationship and a family that doesn't understand me. I still live with my mother and my 47 year old brother. He has clinical psychological problems and has not worked in four years. This is a very negative situation. I know I should get away from living with my family. I have only a meager job, and no car so I can't just leave. But I know I can't stay. I really want to work out my life lesson. But I don't know what to do. I have so much to offer the world. Diane Jackson A. A presence called Manfella came in to respond: You must not force yourself to be someone you're not. You are comfortable being a child to your parents in this life because you were in an orphan in a past life. Your parents who were killed are your parents in this life and you are making up for lost time. Now is the time for you to become self sufficient. You will start making more of a concerted effort in this regard. Many people long to live with their family but cannot. You long to be alone. We cannot always have what we want in life. Sometimes, goals and expectations are out of reach. You must change your viewpoint. It is time for you to be more, and give more of your energy to helping others. Sing to sick children and older people. Change your attitude and appearance, take charge of the likable things about you. You have been far too selfish and you have not seen the true path. Open up to express your true self, a better self. Note from Abenda: Your mother is now too old to be "your mother" to both you and to your brother. She is in the crone stage of a woman's cycle of life, it is time to let her rest. Care for her. Bring her joy. This means you must reevaluate your viewpoint and change your behavior patterns. If you act with love, she will mirror back love. Give yourself a chance to heal your past. __________________________ May 1996 Through automatic writing, Tara's spirit guide Abenda answers questions about a brother's suicide, drug addiction, a mother's guilt, and the fear of dying too young. ___________________________ The following letters are typical of over two hundred I've received during the last quarter. Each envelope is filled with pain and in one form or another, the question, "Why?" Each letter writer feels if they can understand the reason, circumstances will be easier to accept. We all need to feel that justice is part of the plan -- assuming that this isn't a random universe and there is some kind of plan. If there is a plan, it would follow that there is an intelligence behind the plan -- call it God, an energy gestalt, Universal Mind or the Light. Any other name would do as well. And God would be fair, wouldn't she? The more mail I answer, the more I learn about karma as the basis of our reality. This and my other psychic-science studies indicate that the important events in our lives are predestined. That may not be the way we want it to be, but my research indicates it seems to be so. In our reactions to these tests, we have free will. If we respond to circumstances positively, we pass. If we respond negatively, we may need to be retested. No thanks! Let's get it right this time around. My heart goes out to everyone in pain. I wish I could answer all my mail, but it just isn't possible. After reading the letters, I let my spirit guide Abenda choose which to answer -- letters that will relate to many people. I then self-induce a theta-level altered state and contact Abenda. She finds someone in spirit who knows the letter writer or has an awareness of the problem. Under Abenda's carefully orchestrated conditions, this soul controls my hand and the response is received via automatic writing. This has not been explained for several issues and I want to make sure our new readers are aware of how the answers are obtained.
Q. For over a year I did not see my brother John and his wife, because at John's insistence they hid from me and the world in general. His phone number unlisted, his only address a post-office box, I had no idea where he lived. He worked nights to minimize interaction with people. It was only after he committed suicide last year at age 36, I found out he lived only a few blocks away. As his paranoia increased, he became physically abusive to his wife and insisted she have nothing to do with any relatives. She asked for a divorce. Today, she says she hated him. But I loved him, and am probably the only person on earth who is sorry he's gone. When I visited his wife in their apartment, I felt his presence angrily telling me to get out of his place. She gave me his Saint Christopher medal. I put it on and later awakened from a nap feeling utterly despondent. A thought came into my mind. "Go to the gun case. Put a pistol to your head to see what it feels like." I would never think of such a thing. I tore off the medal and haven't worn it since. I would appreciate any assistance you can give John and any advice you can provide. Ann Maxwell A. A group of three brothers came in to talk to Abenda, and the eldest guided my hand -- three sons who once knew John as their father, Thopoulopia, in 1191 in the country now known as Turkey. They said, "In that life, he was brave and bold, but he did not fight for his lands and we died together as a family. That incarnation set up the next -- a life in Algeria. John's phobias started there as a French soldier. He killed many men in skirmishes, was captured and taken to a desolate desert location where he died heart-broken and alone. "In his current life, at age 25, unconscious influences from the Algerian incarnation began to haunt him. He feared being "taken away," as he was in Algeria and as a result of his fears, became his own worst enemy. He tried to make a decent life, but feared the malevolence of others. John is now walking the area of your homeland. We call to him often, but he does not heed us. In time he will join us and we will help him recover. You, Ann, were a soldier with him in Algeria. You have known pain and suffering, but you went home to France, married a village girl and lived a contented life. You can be of great help to your brother by acknowledging his existence. He will start listening to you. Call out to him, asking that he comes to you. Tell him it's over. He doesn't need to wander anymore. We have confidence that he will listen to you. Thank you." Note from Abenda: "Light a candle for John and tell him to go to the light. It is tragic for the family of suicide victims. You always wonder if there was something you could have done -- some remedy, drug or hospital -- just a gentle word. But John's pain was much deeper than he let anyone know. He should have sought medical help, but he didn't and no one is to blame. You are to remember him in his loving state, as he can be that soul again."
Q. I'm separated from my husband Larry who has a dependency on amphetamines. I could no longer stand by and watch him destroy himself on binges. All my efforts to help him have been ineffective. The drug use intensified recently when his mother was diagnosed with inoperable cancer. If he ever manages to get off drugs, I will be there for him. Any advice you can provide will be appreciated. Carol Crouch, A. Abenda brought in a man calling himself Mathew Blance who claims to have known you, Carol, in many lives. He provided this message: "You are not Larry's keeper. Until he can help himself, he cannot be there for you or anyone. It is a strange time in society. The gift of medicine and medications are abused by the over-privileged. Yes, even though Larry feels deep down that life is worthless, he is over-privileged. If he had to work harder to survive, he'd be less likely to indulge in escapist activities. "In addition to obtaining professional help to eliminate the addiction, consider moving to break the patterns in your lives -- mind/body patterns -- physical patterns. It's all too easy to circle back to the same comfortable and charted destruction. Larry needs to accept that he will not be saved by a miracle. It's up to him to act, knowing that increased self-esteem and self-discipline follow the overcoming of any addiction. "You need to work on your own self-esteem and alleviate the guilt. You can help your husband by being a true friend. Give him information and guidance when and if he's ever ready to change. Then it will happen. It is also time for you to be concerned about you. You're not confused. You are caring, loyal and loving. Do your best." Note from Abenda: "Larry's mother's terminal illness mirrored his own mortality. You have also threatened and made demands. These external factors have set forces into motion that will result in decisions he is processing on many levels. You may not know it, but you are gaining strength as the result of your trials. You will no longer allow others to take advantage of you -- of your good nature and love. If they want to be with you, they must shape up or ship out. Continue to use your nurturing gifts. In time, you will be led to help others in a supportive environment."
Q. My son Chris was ill for nine years -- Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, infections and forced inactivity resulted in severe mental anguish. Once a self-disciplined athlete, his weakness and despair resulted in a loss of mental strength, and he left this earth last July. Since then, I have been overcome with a terrible guilt, feeling that I didn't do enough. I go over and over everything that led up to that terrible day. This continued emotional stress, and coping with the financial drain of so many years of illness has rendered me ineffective. If you can offer any information to help me "overcome" and do some good in his memory, I will be ever grateful. E. Demas A. Abenda sought out a woman named Willona for the following response. She said, "I am from Czechoslovakia. I was a gypsy girl who used to read for you. I liked you very much and I now watch over you. Chris visits me often. Do not feel you didn't do enough for him. He is extremely grateful for all your love, wisdom and caring. He had to go on to his next phase of existence. 'No worries now, Mom,' is his message to you. "Chris needed to leave, as you had to leave him in Egypt in 986 A.D. He thought he should have done more. You had a beautiful life. He was your son then also and helped you as much as he could. In this life, he chose you as his mother to help clear the Egyptian lifetime so he can go on to new learning potentials. His disease was related to a Brazilian lifetime. As a landowner, he subjected others to poisonous plants without realizing it. They were testing trees and fruits to create new foods. Thirty people died accidentally. This 'false guilt' carried over as a debt to be balanced. "Your biggest gift to Chris would be to be happy and healthy. Do not feel guilty for he is doing well and is glad to be rid of that sick body. His suffering is over and he expects his mom's suffering to be over too. He sends messages of love and wants to say, 'We will meet again.'" Note from Abenda: "I suggest you volunteer your time to a terminally ill organization -- to talk to parents. Once a month would help you. Your pain and guilt could be released by helping other parents experiencing similar sorrows. You know that Chris is in a better place. Of course you miss him. You will always miss him and he you. But you will come together again and again. Soon, you will begin to experience peace."
Q. After 32 years of marriage, three children and five grandchildren, my husband died of a heart attack at age 59. Seventeen months later, I became involved with a man who had a very harsh childhood. After 21 years, his marriage ended in a bitter divorce, leaving him angry and resentful. After a five-month relationship he rejected me in a cruel way. Since then, each time we try to mend the relationship, he or I self-destruct. I don't want to spend my life with an angry, unforgiving man. Yet I can't free myself. I feel that I have unfinished business with him. How do I settle up and peacefully go on with my life? Cynthia Killian, A. Abenda introduced me to a man named Marco who wanted to communicate with you. He said, "I was your eldest child in Bolivia. I now watch over you as I felt you watched over me after you died in that lifetime. I want to tell you not to despair. You are learning the ways of another's guilt and grief. Remove yourself from this situation and your life will look better. Be more careful who you date and spend time with. You have had true friendship and you know what you are looking for. Do not settle for less because you are lonely. Take time to heal, time to relax. Don't compare your husband to others you meet. Life will soon be different and you will accept this phase of your life. "In the Bolivian lifetime, you had many children with your departed husband of this life. You died in childbirth after your eighth child. He was left with the children. He had adored you. The children grew up healthy and happy because he praised your spirit. He lived an example of love and truth. You must continue on in this lifetime. Make him proud of you in all your decisions. Love, Marco." Note from Abenda: "Marco has the heart of a child -- innocent and pure. So do you, Cynthia. Trust that you will survive financially and that you can have love on your terms -- not because of loneliness or someone else's need to be saved. You will begin to make wise choices. Have courage."
Q. When I was in school, life seemed to hold limitless possibilities for me. The contributions I wanted to make were endless and varied. I finished college with a teaching degree as I have a real love for children. But a poorly chosen marriage partner, a move to another state, and an unplanned pregnancy have grounded me for the past four years. My son is the most important, and most pleasing thing in my life. But I find myself living through correspondence with two people to whom I feel drawn. In the past year I have been diagnosed with cancer (at 31). I fear that I will die without ever having lived, and without completing my goals with my son. Do I have a purpose in this lifetime? Or did I miss it as the result of poor choices and bad decisions? T.J. (name withheld by request), A. A woman named Phenelia wanted to respond. She explained that she was a Greek teacher who once taught you to sew and have confidence in yourself. You were male in that life and great friends. "You are living the life you set out to experience to resolve your karma and fulfill your dharma. If you had not made the decisions you made, you would not have your son. And he is no accident. Trust in the divinity of your own plan. You have many gifts to offer the world. "In a past life you were a governor in a remote land. You helped in the building of hospitals and finding people to care for the sick and elderly. Your son was the sovereign. In this life, on a much smaller scale, you will be doing the same. Do not fear. Your son will follow you. His dharma is to provide help, shelter and protection to those in need. You have come together to complete a task -- a very brave task. No one can know what it is like to be truly sick unless they have been there. You have chosen to experience this for a reason. You returned to the earth plane to carry on this mission. You have not been self-destructive. You are trying to attain the status of a divine being -- closer to God and the Supreme light. Your karma is not one of angst and guilt, but of service. Bless you in this time." Note from Abenda: "You need not worry. You are of the light. Do follow up on your dreams and pursue your goals. You will be lead to the right people. Allow yourself to ask and gifts will come to you." ___________________________ October 1996 Through automatic writing, Tara's spirit guide Abenda answers questions about an "angel-gone-bad," a problem-ridden family, a decision to have a baby, a women's conversation with her dead husband after an auto accident, and much more. ___________________________ The following message is from my Spirit Guide Abenda: "The vibration of Peace keeps mankind in balance and evolving in a blessed light. When more people are hateful than peaceful, mankind descends into a Dark Age. Not all can heed the call of community and leadership, but each can make an effort to make a difference -- to break free of fear and act to support what you know to be true -- what you know to be right. You were brave enough to reincarnate upon the earth to fulfill your destiny and purpose. You must also have the courage to promote Peace and take charge when you can make a difference. I'm not talking about physical strength and bravado. It is determination, compassion and acting upon your beliefs that will make a difference. The end of the century is a perilous time on the earth plane. Every light-bearer is needed to tip the scales in the "light" direction. Remember that the world you create today (or allow to be created) is the world you will reincarnate into in the future." --In loving oneness, Abenda. Thanks to all who have written me over this last quarter. After reading each letter, I let Abenda choose letters she feels will relate to the greatest number of readers. I then induce a deep Theta-level trance, contact Abenda, and she finds someone in spirit that knows the letter writer or is aware of the problem. Under Abenda's carefully orchestrated conditions, this soul controls my hand and the response is received via automatic writing. Regular readers are aware of this, but I need to explain it again for those new to Soaring Spirit. And if you're reading this column for the first time, "Welcome," and to the regulars a special "Hello" too. Your interest is sincerely appreciated.
Q. I married an angel-gone-bad; very talented, but dark and cruel. Our marriage ended in divorce, financial loss, career crisis, and a broken heart. I was a notch above despair only because our beautiful daughter had been spared his dark side -- I thought. A year ago she attempted suicide and was found to be a chronic alcoholic at 15. She revealed her father and his father had both been molesting her. Is it karma? I am learning to make better choices, but maybe my life-long vision of myself as strong, confident, and a healer is a delusion. My daughter is nearly 12-months clean and sober, and she has a strong will to live. Any wisdom or insight you can provide, no matter how painful, will be most welcome. S. D. (name withheld) A. A man named Bramaha -- large, dark complected, with a full beard -- came to write through my hand. "You chose to return to this man in this life, as you were his love in the Sudana beautiful harem girl who loved him very much. Although he had many lovers, he cared for you. He felt it was his right to have anyone and anything he wanted, including sex with his many daughters. Today, he continues this sexual pattern. His current-life moral code is not in keeping with the times. It is too bad he is not seeing a hypnotherapist, for if he knew the source of the problem, maybe he could bring himself back into balance. He never meant harm, but has been blind to his hunger for satisfaction and the pain it has caused. He will have to learn through the pain of being molested in a future time. "You have incarnated to be with him many times, but now the anger is strong. You must release this negative energy or it will assure a future union. Search your heart for forgiveness. In other times, you too have been the perpetrator of suffering. "Your daughter will be fine when she has had time to access her feelings and come to terms with what has happened. You do not need to hover over her in fear. She needs you and you accept your responsibility. Be a source of support, fun and camaraderie. The bond you share is good and will help to carry you through all trying tests. She is also testing your love from another shared lifetime. You left her in a past life -- gave her away at birth. You did not care what happened to her. But in this life, she has found a way to make sure that you cared about her. In doing so, she took steps she didn't realize would be so difficult. You will all work it out. Forgiveness is the key to karmic evolution." Note from Abenda: "Yes, the situation is karmic. On a spiritual level, you accepted this experience for the balance it offered you and your daughter. Another way to look at this, you accepted the role of mother lion ready to save your child. It is your dharma -- your duty to yourself and your daughter. You will survive, and it will be over when you purge yourself of the repugnant emotions currently permeating your mind. When you do, you break the tie with your husband and in the future he will have to find someone with karma matching his needs. Work at believing in yourself as a good mother, provider and teacher. No matter what else happens, you now gain confidence in your actions."
Q. My brother David is sitting in prison for the second time. Two of my sisters are married to wife-beaters. My oldest sister has been divorced three times and has given up on relationships at age 43. The second eldest sister is married to a man who needs to be taken care of. They all have physical ailments, diseases and addictions as well as problems verging on financial ruin. Out of six children, I'm seen as the success, a fact that makes me cringe. Yes, my life and relationships are better than theirs, but I feel like my precious situation will be taken away at any time. I suffer from anxiety attacks and depression. Can you help us? Vickie Quinley A. Bradley Bissonet, a tall man in a top hat appeared saying he wanted to communicate with Vickie: "Do not be sad and alone. You are a beacon of light to your friends and family. You are making it in spite of the odds. You are your own person and so are the members of your family. The changes you think you could make would not serve them or yourself. Everyone has their own karma to work out. The question as to why you're part of this family is to be found in the past. "In a small Georgia town you were a young black girl during the Civil War. Your family was poor, worked hard and you loved them very much. Because you were younger than the others, they had to assure your safety, sometimes to their own peril. Without a young child they thought they might have made their way to freedom in the North. This was not true, but thoughts generate actions. In this life you chose a family you love, but often don't understand. In many ways the Georgia situation is now reversed. Your thoughts about them are not necessarily so. They must work out difficult karma individually and as a group. You are their example and they are yours. As those in the past fulfilled their responsibilities, you will fulfill yours. You'll shake your head in disbelief, but you'll do what you can. Even when it doesn't appear to be so, know that you are in their hearts." Note from Abenda: You are to carry the torch of love and oneness in this family. The brothers expect you to support them. But you must learn to center yourself, knowing when to give out and when to open to receive. It is a gift to generate love and compassion in another. Do not try to control any of the situations, for this is not within your power. Remember to be kind and compassionate, for this incarnation creates the next. You will now find it within you to be more understanding. Release the depression and throw out the guilt -- everything is karmic and evolving into something better. You deserve a wonderful life."
Q. I'm writing because I'm still confused about having a baby -- about feeling pressured because I will soon be 38. We talked at the Personal Prophecy Seminar in March. For some reason after discussing the pros and cons, you felt a need to tell me to have it. You said someone in spirit was prodding you to speak. Well, I'm still confused. I'm close to getting my Bachelors degree in "Human Resources and Community." I work full time as a police officer and have a four-year-old daughter. I'm considering a promotional test for Police Sgt., which may be a good opportunity. Four more years and I'll be eligible for a pension at my 20th year. Can you help me sort this out? B.V. (Name withheld) A. A kindly woman named Francesca claimed to be your nanny in a Ukraine lifetime and wrote this for you: "There is a child who awaits, but the choice is yours. There is a special purpose of this child. Do you feel the pull? There are other options for this soul, but he feels the best potential is through you. You want to hold back for the sake of stability, but the baby feels he will give you stability and structure of a different kind. He wants to be with you and feel loved by you. "Past lives with this entity: Rome. You are both soldiers and dear friends. When you are on a mission, the other soldiers are injured or killed. The two of you are left alone. You hide in the forest and in time settle and make a small home there. Eventually you find women, create a life, and are content for that incarnation. "Not as good karma for the father-to-be: The family was slaughtered on the prairie by raiding Indians. All died. The unborn child feels the need to come back to protect the family." Note from Abenda: "Most births are set into motion before our own births. But not always. If you want a choice you are given this right. This child for you is a choice. From this side of the veil, this child has good karma with your family. You would not be disappointed. Let life unfold in love.
Q. Five years ago I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I set out to learn all I could so I could treat myself, and for five years my life has been vanishing before my eyes and I can't stop it. I know medically all there is to know. There is no government or professional help. So, here I lay engrossed by the physical pain, tired, and unthinking. I've attracted a disease I can't get out of -- no cure -- and no death like with AIDS or cancer. The fatigue is progressing. Life is death. I just want to find the energy to kill the body. Maybe all this is a spiritual crisis. I, for once in my life, have no where to turn except to God. To a God that I've always had doubts about and never believed was there for me. All I know is that I'm tired of being tired, in physical pain, and of my mind being lost. I don't want to be separated from God anymore. I need communion and union. Help me. Marsha Brown A. Note from Tara: I'm sure other readers have fought this battle. If anyone is willing to share their story with Marsha, send the letter to me -- seal it in an envelope and place it in a larger envelope addressed to me at Box 38, Malibu, CA 90265. I'll send it to Marsha. For the writing, a woman calling herself Frederva appeared. She was heavy-set, attired in a 1940's style dress and silk stockings. She claimed to be Marsha's guide, and said they once lived in Czechoslovakia -- a grand lifetime of wealth and privilege. Frederva wrote: "Marsha has had many horrific lifetimes that relate to her current situation. When she was 33, in a small town near Oxford, England, she lost her family to influenza, was heartbroken, and went insane. She was committed to a sanitarium, but it was poorly managed. They beat her regularly and on lucid days she hated her wardens. She lived out her days in the institution. This was the beginning of her disillusionment with the medical profession. "Resistance generated in the English lifetime, combined with a desire to provide proper care for others resulted in an incarnation in aboriginal Australia. She became the medicine woman and gave potions to cure the ill. She accidentally prescribed a concoction that killed a few members of the tribe's people. Banished, never to return, she died a few years later of exposure and loneliness. "Still attempting to resolve this unusual karma, Marsha, as a Yankee doctor, administered to the sick on battlefields of the Civil War. A poorly trained young man, he was appalled by death and dying and didn't trust his ability to truly help anyone. Today, Marsha no longer has faith in man's ability to heal. This is a time for her to learn to reach out -- to ask for help and trust others. This is part of her test. She must find a good nutritionist and the right doctor. She must not fear. She must act." Note from Abenda: Know that you can be well. There is a path to wellness awaiting if you will dedicate yourself to the journey. Do not give up hope. You will recover your lost life and have a chance to live again.
Q. Driving tired, I fell asleep behind the wheel, woke up when I hit a marker then overcorrected and drove straight into an oak tree. My guides must have taken me out of my body, because I don't recall the impact. I do recall another motorist asking if I was okay. I opened my eyes, but was in some kind of safe cocoon of peace, love and warmth that felt like a huge safety net. Stunned, bloody, bruised and reeling, I was talking to my deceased husband about what I had done. I also saw a tall man in a cream-colored, hooded robe, and the vehicle was filled with other spirits and holy beings. The police wanted me to stay conscious, but I wanted to see the divine presence that stayed with me until the ambulance was on the way to the emergency room. My injuries were minor -- a broken thumb and wrist. Through the years since my husband passed over into spirit (Dec. 1987), I have felt that I would cross over if given the chance. He has been my rock. I realize now he continues to look out for me. Tara, can you help me fill in any blank places? Was this just an accident or did I have a near death experience? I do not recall any light but I have no doubt about the entities in the vehicle. I am in awe of all this, but at the same time I am feeling very disconnected from myself and life. Betty Walters A. Tollendia came to write, claiming you incarnated together as sisters in Holland in 1210. "You have come to seek us once again. We are delighted. You know that your work is not yet done on the earth. The accident was a chance for us to remove a few obstacles to your course. You no longer need some of the people in your life -- those that tie you down and keep you from achieving a sense of oneness with others. It is time to open to love and new friendships -- to make changes in your life that will benefit you. You know that your husband holds you always in love and esteem. But you have not moved on as fast as he had hoped. He always felt he tied you down. The accident was his chance to send you love. Do not allow yourself to feel disoriented. You belong on the material plane at this time. Adjust yourself to that vibration. You can do this by asking as you go to sleep. You will soon meet others who will lead you into new helping and caring work. It will seem like a hobby, but you will gain much satisfaction and it will become more." Note from Abenda: "In a way, the accident was a gift. You know we are here, always guiding you to advancement. You have sensed the doorway, now walk through it in your mind's eye to the next phase of your earth life."
Click to go to: |
||||