Resistance is fear, which is negative programming. In addition, there is a universal law which states: "What you resist you draw to you." As long as you resist something, you are locked into it and you perpetuate its influence in your life.
Thus, it will make you life much simpler not to resist, "what is." Some things are facts. Income taxes exist ... that's what is. Gravity exists ... that's what is. Your mate is quiet and soft-spoken ... that's what is. You can spend your time attempting to change what is, but there isn't much you're going to do about it. Instead, concentrate your efforts upon that which you can change.
The positive or negative qualities you react to inn others are a reflection of the same qualities within you. They are a mirror for you and if you are aware, you will learn from the mirror. How does this concept reflect in your current relationships?
STOP ASKING, "WHY DID YOU DO THAT?"
"Those who justify themselves do not convince." --Lao-Tzu
When you ask, "why did you do that?" you show a lack of awareness. You seek reasons and reasons early exist. People always act emotionally, doing what they want to do. They invent logical reasons to justify their actions to themselves and others, yet the reasons are just rationales and excuses and rarely have much to do with the facts. The reasons don't really matter and no one could possibly know what they are. They lieu buried in your viewpoint, which is the result of the past programming of all your lifetimes.
The urge to prove oneself right jiggles the sense of ludicrousness. The Master of Life appreciates the man who can get off it.